YESTURDAY
In case those of you who attend/attended NBHS haven't heard....Jon White died early this morning in a car crash. Jentry was driving. Jentry is alive. They had been drinking and Jentry took a turn WAY too fast. Joey was on the phone with them the entire time. I don't know what is wrong or right to do. I've cried and now I'm in shock. But I don't know what to do. And I don't understand it. Jon was popular and nice! He wasn't an unlikeable asshole! He was nice and decent. He was even nice to me! I don't think anyone can understand what that meant to me. Yeah, it meant something! He was 17! He wasn't even Clayton's age! I guess I keep forgetting we're not invincible just because we're young.
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TODAY
Jon White, 17, died around 2:30 AM [Sunday morning]. Car crash. I've cried, but mostly I'm in shock. How can someone so young and so undeserving of this receive this? He was popular, yeah, but he was nice. He was nice to me when his friends were cruel. I can't believe this. I'm praying for Jon, Jon's family, Jon's friends (basically all of Leland and NBHS), and Jentry. He was so young. He was a great person. He didn't deserve this. No one does! I saw him just this past week! He was at school...I saw him! Jon, we'll miss you so much.
-from my myspace (thanks for the idea brad)
As for today....it was sad. I felt alone for some reason. They painted the graffiti rock in memory of him. They've wrote it on the bathroom walls. So many people crying. And all I could do was offer a smile of "it will be ok" and I know that that is never enough. I want to cry, but I can't. I miss him. I wasn't his best friend, but like I said, he was nice to me when others were cruel. I saw him last week and I thought "I should say hi. He's busy, I'll do it later." I realize now that I won't always have later. To all of my friends, though we may not always agree, thank you for being there and being my friend. I feel like I'm even more separate from this town now because...I'm not mad at Jentry. I can't blame him. That is not how I cope. I've looked at it. If he was meant to live, God would have let him live. It was simply his time. I understand why Jentry did what he did post-crash because I can empathize with him and I know from personal expirience...you don't truely have control. Everyone says "I wouldn't have done that. I would have done this." YOU DON'T KNOW THAT! How can you prove that? Read a little, live a little, you are not always in control up there! How do you know what you'd do? Prove it! Get off of Jentry's back! He's going to live the rest of his life with his best friend's blood on his hands because he feels it's his fault...when it's no one's. Everything happens for a reason. It was Jon's time. And he's happy now because he's in Heaven with God and eternal happiness. I hope someone understand what I mean by this. I hope someone besides me knows that it's not Jentry's fault. It's no ones!
Jon will be missed, but let's remember that 2 lives could have been lost that night. Then who would you blame? Exactly. It's no one's fault. It was destiny. It was tragic, but it was destiny. And I know God is holding all of us and someday I won't be the only one who knows.
